I sit here writing in my tiny, overpriced college apartment, overly excited and terrified of what the future will be, who I will become, and where my career will take me. These fears are confirmed through constant set backs and daily reminders from strangers that I don’t have what it takes to make it in the industry. Concurrently, my passion to write and the excitement I feel when I make myself proud silence the hate from others and doubts that find their way to circle through my mind.
I grew up in a conservative neighborhood with very few strong, female leaders to base myself off of outside my family. A small town comes with an even smaller higher school, a graduating class of just sixty people. Knowing the middle name of every person you graduated with seems great in theory, but it has its downfalls. When you graduate high school with the same exact people you met the first day of kindergarten, it’s incredibly difficult to explore yourself and opportunities without being judged. It’s challenging to find the people who want to see you stretch and succeed and not the ones just looking for something to talk about.
Coming from the small town of Scranton, life can be boring and slightly confusing with little to no exposure to the world outside of the Electric City. It may be fun sharing the same roots as Michael Scott and Dwight Schrute, but it was time for me to leave Dunder Mifflin behind and find something more for myself in the City of Brotherly Love which brings me to this chapter of my life.
Moving to Philadelphia to further my education was the best decision I could have made. It allowed me to chose people to surround me who would push me towards my dreams and celebrate my victories. I quickly realized the people I chose to be around made an incredible impact on the person I want to become because I have been able exceed my own expectations. I never imagined the possibilities I would create for myself, including the opportunity to intern in New York City.
I dream of becoming a writer in any form, whether that be through a journalistic approach or even becoming a published author. I am happiest when I allow myself to ignore the sometimes overwhelming fear of disapproval and just let the words flow freely. This blog is a stepping point on my journey and I hope to encourage girls of all ages to follow whatever far-reaching dreams they may have by doing just that for myself.
As I look back at all the days I spent sitting in my high school desk questioning who I was meant to be, I pray that no other girl has the same fears and self doubts I had at such a young age. I wish I understood that I could have done anything that I put my mind to and that no one had the power to tell me otherwise.
I feared I would never have any clue what I wanted to do with my life when the time came. Even though I still don’t truly know how the rest of my life will unfold, I know the direction I want to take it in. I feared I wouldn’t find friends in college who didn’t think I was weird or annoying and accepted me for who I was. I’ve managed to find a group of friends who don’t give a damn who I am or who I was. I’ve met the girls who will stand as my bridesmaids. I feared I was never meant to go to college, that I didn’t have what it takes. As I write this, I am starting my junior year and wishing it would never end.
I’ve vowed to myself that I will become whatever I dream to be and pray that someday, every girl sitting at her desk never doubts who she is. To all the girls sitting in their desks right now wondering who they will turn out to be, continue to wonder but don’t ever fear. You will find who you are meant to be with time and without even truly realizing it and that is the moment you are working towards.
Jamie Walsh is a junior at Temple University and a lover of toaster strudel, beluga whales, and all things Joe Biden. She has a passion to write and explore the all possibilities Philadelphia has to offer as a student, a woman, and a dreamer.